What is it like being a female sports fan? Well, before this turns into a whiny bitchfest, know that it’s not always a parade of condescension and unnecessarily being quizzed by total strangers to determine if your fandom is “worthy” of existing in their sacred space of bro-dom. But by “not always” i mean…it’s still like that 90% of the time.
Now before you say “I’ve never been sexist to female sports fans! I would never,” I need you to stop and think. Have you ever said “you throw/hit/shoot, etc. like a girl”? Have you ever called a male athlete by a woman’s name when he wasn’t playing up to his full potential? Have you ever seen a male athlete cry and thought and/or said “don’t be such a girl” or the ever popular “man up” or the slightly vulgar “don’t be such a pussy” (hey, at least my reproductive organs had the good sense to stay inside my body. I don’t call that weakness…I call it a healthy survival instinct. Thanks, human body!)
I was once at a New York Rangers game and some drunk dude shouted behind me “YO HANK! WHY DON’T YOU SHOVE A TAMPON UP YOUR FIVE-HOLE!!!!” This had to be the most nonsensical chirp I’d ever heard in my life. It would have almost made sense, given the location of the five-hole, if he’d been letting in a ton of goals…but it was very early in the game and the score was 0-0. So I’m still baffled, after all these years, what purpose a tampon would have served in this situation.
Aren’t there better ways to say “hey you suck!” that doesn’t involve equating femininity with being weak, or delicate, or lesser? Forget the fact that you probably have a mom, or a grandma, or a sister. Everyone has at least one female relative, but you shouldn’t need one to know that insulting the entire female sex is not cool. You may not even realize that you’re doing it. Casual sexism is a thing, people. A real and frustrating thing. The important thing is, if someone calls you on your shit or says that you’ve hurt their feelings, apologize and adjust your behavior. And whatever you do…do not say “No I didn’t” or “It’s just a joke” or “You’re being too sensitive.” Invalidating someone’s feeling is a crappy thing to do. And imagine someone telling you “you’re too sensitive” the next time your entire gender is used as punch line.
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